So far, the week leading up to Mother’s Day, has been extremely uneventful. Usually by now we would have received calls home from the school, either unhappy with his performance, or behavior, as well as being frustrated by inappropriate behaviors at home. Yet this year, after the first experience of wonderful fall and winter holidays, again there is nothing, there has been no hint what so ever that my adopted stepson has been having trouble with this time of year. While he has not mentioned this weekend, and what holiday it holds on Sunday, he has also not acted out at school by not doing work, or getting into fights with other students, nor has he acted out at home.

I am left wondering if the delightful holiday season that we experienced, will carry over into Mother’s Day? I have been walking daily with my neighbors for about two weeks now at night, and today of all days, my adopted stepson decided to ride his bike along with us, to spend some extra time with his mom. He is aware that we do not walk on the weekends, and that today would be his last chance for the week to get in some extra time, yet I expected him to be more distant, as he was in the past, and not wish to pick the last weekday before Mother’s Day, to walk with us.

Yet there he was, minutes after myself and my next door neighbor set out to collect the rest of the walking gang, on his bike smiling away, awaiting us to start our journey so that he could tag along as well. I was pleasantly surprised, as well as caught off guard with his behavior. Normally during this time of year he becomes distant, lost in thought, yet this year, he wants to be involved in what I am doing, and wants to spend more time with me. Am I enthralled? Most definitely. Is a part of me still waiting for the other foot to fall after so many years of acting out and unhappiness around this time of year…you bet!

With such a wonderful winter holiday season behind us, I am optimistic that this year, will be the year that is different. That this year will in fact be the year that he embraces what he has now, and not dwells on the past and what he wanted, as well as what could have been. My husband took our four-year-old shopping today, knowing full well that being smacked in the face with all the Mother’s Day stuff for sale at all of the local stores would put my adopted stepson into a tizzy, and that signing an already picked out card would be all that he could emotionally handle. And while I am still cautious in my thinking, I am still wondering if next year will be the year where he can go out and pick out a card on his own, without feeling like the world around him is ending.

With his actions towards the winter holidays, as well as his lack of acting out towards this Mother’s Day, I am left thinking that perhaps he is healing his past traumas, and beginning, finally, to see the good that he has in his life now. Even with his academic struggles in school this past quarter, I have seen so much growth and change in him, that for the first time in a long time, I am ready to accept the fact that he is, indeed, moving forward, and seeing the good that he has in his life. Will it last? Only time will tell. Am I happy about it in the moment? Words cannot describe the amount of joy and pride that I have inside about him not flipping out so close to this hurtful holiday for him.

Even if it all goes to crap on Sunday, I can still take pride in the fact that the time leading up to the holiday was not only peaceful, but enjoyable. It is the baby steps in situations like these that you must seek happiness, and fulfillment in, and for the first time in a long time, I am able to do that. I can see the small steps that have been taken, I can see him moving forward at his own pace, and that is what I choose to rejoice in. I do not care if the celebration brunch blows up in my face on Sunday, for I can see the progress made in my adopted stepson, and appreciate the calm before the holiday. I understand that this time of year is hard for him, and the fact that he is handling it this well, is reason enough for celebrating, and being proud of how far he has truly come!

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