To read Part One of this story please click HERE

The counselor that we have found after our move has been an absolute angel for our family. She has helped each and everyone of us so much, that there is no way that we could ever repay her, or say enough 'thank yous' to her. My adopted stepson has grown so much this past year, and made so many leaps and bounds in so many areas that it has been wonderful to watch, as well as be a part of. Having him on medication has also helped him to be able to focus better, which has also been a tremendous asset in helping our family to blend more, and be able to connect with each other much easier, and on a much deep level than ever before. While he is still hesitant to let people “in” he is starting to do so bit by bit, which gives my husband as well as myself hope again that he will be able to one day function as a “normal” person.

To kick off the summer, I purchased a large above ground pool for the boys (as well as myself!) My adopted stepson was, and is absolutely thrilled, as a pool of his own was one of the promises that his biological mother had used as a lure for him to go and live with her, that was never followed thru with, or even really a serious thought on her end. So for him to finally have a “dream come true” was absolutely outstanding to give him, as well as to simply see him be so happy and appreciative to have a pool of his own. He helped assemble the pool, and even got to drive the Bobcat that we had rented to level out a spot in our backyard for the pool to sit in. Having our own pool will give us plenty of chances to play, swim, and bond with each other throughout the summer, and I am definitely looking forward to that!

I still cannot believe that he will be in high school in only a matter of months. When I look at him, or think of him, I still see that eight-year-old little boy, so lost, and looking for a mother to be in his life and love him as a mother should love her child. I do believe that once we are able to both let our guards down towards one and other, and accept each other truly as mother and son, that his behavior issues will disappear for the most part, minus the typical teen stuff.

Even with all of the bad things, and the general crap that we have been through for the past six years, I still love him as much as I did when I met him, and couldn’t be more proud of the things that he has accomplished, as well as his own emotional issues and demons that he has faced and conquered through therapy. He is slowly becoming a man, his own man, and that is truly amazing to witness, and know that I have been an influence in his life, and have been part of what has helped him to learn, grow and trust. While I may be burned out at the current moment, I will never, ever give up on him, and my goal for him to be happy, no matter what it is that defines ‘happy’ for him.

I will support him and stand behind him in life no matter what it is that he decides to make of himself, I just hope that one day he will be willing to see that, and accept it. While he has been doing better, and been more accepting of family, and how a family works and runs, I do know that he will slide again, and knowing that will make it easier on me when it comes. If I expect it, then I can prepare for it, he is still only a child, and I cannot expect him to be perfect, and get everything right all the time. And while he may be fourteen years old, emotionally he is still several years younger, and that inner younger child is the one that we need to nurture and support during the summer in order to help him grow and heal, as well as to gain his trust in us both as people and as parents.

The more that I think about this summer, even as I type this, the more I am getting excited about all the opportunities that he and I will have to make our bond stronger and stronger. It is time for the walls, all of them, to come down and for all of us to accept one and other for who we truly are, unconditionally.

As the summer progresses I will be writing about our relationship and how it is progressing, as well as how we are accomplishing it, so that others who are out there struggling to connect with their adopted stepchild can have some examples to go by, as well as some light at the end of the tunnel to see another family in their shoes go through what they are going through, and come out alright. As long as parents remember to never give up, and that where there is life there is hope, things can always work out in the end with enough love, blood, sweat, and tears!