My adopted stepson is still struggling with getting all of his worked done, and turned in on time, and with the end of the quarter quickly approaching there isn't much time left to get any work turned in that the teachers will still accept. He is getting up there in his teen years, and we are at a point in his little life where we are planning for his future, and poor grades are simply not going to look good on any college application!

He would like to go to college, and even possibly the military, yet seems to be reluctant to do the steps that it takes to achieve either one of those goals. We know that he has the smarts to do whatever it is that he would like to do in life, it is the drive that he is currently lacking, and finding a way for him to realize that he is in control of his future and how bright, or grim it shall be has been nearly impossible.

So last night we had a talk with him. Not the usual you stand there and stare blankly at me while I speak and you ignore me talk, but a real, honest, I say something and then you in turn say something as well conversation...I know, shocking isn't it? Like many abandoned children, he has trust issues , and opening up and *gasp* sharing feelings with anyone is extremely difficult for him and makes him terribly uncomfortable, but to his credit, he did so yesterday nonetheless.

I am very proud that he was able to share his feelings with both myself as well as my husband, yet not so much when it comes to the report from one of his classes that states he is still missing quite a bit of work. We talked about that some briefly today, but honestly I didn't have it in me to really address it. I am wiped, my husband is wiped, and neither of us felt like parroting the same things that came out of our mouths yesterday.

Instead of lingering on the anger that I have over the fact that he continues to sluff off his work and destroy his own future before it even had a chance to take flight, I have decided to focus on the fact that he was able to open up and share a little bit about his inner self. Being one with trust issues myself, I have a great appreciation for how difficult that was for him to do, not only once with his dad, but again with myself.

Hopefully he has learned, if nothing else, that it is okay to come to us with problems and issues that he has. If I had a nickel for each and every time I called upon my own mom for help as a teenager alone...I would be one rich lady! Maybe, just maybe he has learned that it is okay to open up, it is okay to share feelings, thoughts, concerns, and more than just materialistic desires with us, that truly it's okay, we don't bite!