Have I ever shared with you how incredibly smart my adopted stepson is? I am sure that I have mentioned it a time or two on here (after all when your child is classified as a genius, it is news that you are going to want to share now and again!) He tests off the charts when it comes to just about everything. He honestly is smarter than many adults that I know, and has been that way, when it comes to book smarts, since I have had the pleasure of knowing him. His father too is highly intelligent, as well as his little brother, and I am no dummy myself, so lucky for both boys we have both nature, and nurture on our side when it comes to smarts. We are simply a family that loves to learn.

Yet my adopted stepson's smarts have gotten him into trouble more than once, which may seem odd to some, yet I am sure that others out there who are raising highly intelligent children will nod right along with me on this one: that having learning come so easy to you, can cause quite a bit of laziness. Because he can glance at a page of spelling words for only a minute or two, and retain the spelling and meaning of more than ninety percent of what was just briefly in front of him, putting more effort into learning just doesn't appeal to him at all. When it comes down to it, why put the extra effort into studying, when he can get by with only looking at the words once and retain the majority of them? To him studying seems rather pointless, when he can already do better than most children with only having to glance at the same material that others must study daily for, in the hopes of making the same grades that my adopted stepson makes.

The public school system has also not done a great job on instilling a good sense of hard work in him, often letting him do his own thing instead of following along with the rest of the class, showing him that the rules time and time again did not apply to him, because learning came easy for him. When he finally got a teacher that refused to let him march to the beat of his own drum, and actually participate in class along with the rest of the students, it was very hard for him to deal with, as he had never been forced to be part of the group before and had no idea how to do it, nor did he have any interest whatsoever in learning. That was his fourth grade year, and it was a very tough one for him to get through, which in turn meant it was an absolute nightmare for us to get through as well.

He tested the waters again last year, seeing if he could again get by with not doing his work, since the teachers knew how smart he was already and once again he was looking to cash in on that inborn intelligence and skate by without having the same rules apply to him that applied to everyone else. His test landed him right into summer school for round two of English 9, and once again he was shown that just telling others that you are smart doesn't cut it, you have to show it through your choices and actions.

I am sure that we will still struggle with the studying issue for the rest of high school. While I see it as only five minutes of his time to learn the words, he sees it as five minutes of his time that is being taken away from fun stuff, when he could still pass the test without having to take those five minutes of study time. Yet he still needs to learn how to study and prepare himself for being an adult, because eventually he will come to a subject that he must learn, that does not, for whatever reason, actually come easy for him, and then knowing how to study will indeed come in handy for him.

He is slowly learning that just having a natural talent for something does not mean that you do not have to push yourself to new limits and reach new heights, that even the smart must buckle down and work, push themselves, and teach themselves to have focus and self discipline. Being smart doesn't entitle you to be lazy, being smart enough to finish all of your work efficiently and correctly the first time so that you have time to yourself does; a lesson that many adults are still trying to grasp, yet one I am optimistic about him learning at some point in the future...after all I know that he has the brains to 'get' it!



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