What makes you feel more like a mother, or parent, than getting bragging rights to a child whom you love? Nothing seems to feel better than getting to sing to the world how wonderful, beautiful, or smart your child is. Recently I was afforded the opportunity to claim bragging rights. My adopted stepson has had exams all this past week. He dressed himself nicely the entire week, because he was ‘dressing for success’ in his words. Perhaps the clothes helped, or it could be that he is simply that smart, but he aced all of his tests, even receiving a one hundred percent on his history exam, do I have a smart boy or what?

I got on the phone and began calling all the family, friends, and neighbors that I could think of to let them know the wonderful news. Everyone was in awe of his intelligence, as usual, and I was beaming with pride. We celebrated at home, and have praised and praised him for doing such a wonderful job in school; it has been so amazing to see not only how well he is doing, but just how happy he is now.

I believe that bragging goes right along with the claiming process, which is extremely important in the bonding process between parent and adopted child. When we are bragging about our children, we are claiming them as our own; we are seeing them as an extension of ourselves, our family, and our hard work of parenting and loving our adopted children. We do not see them as being adopted at that moment, we simply see them as our children, our children whom have done something so wonderful that we simply much get out and share it with the world.

Being afforded the opportunity to brag about our children is a way for us to feel closer to them, for a way for us to feel validated as a parent, and that what we are doing parenting wise is working, and paying off. It gives us a chance to see that not only what we are doing is working for our children, but to be able to share it with others and hear positive feedback, which also helps us to feel more confident in ourselves as well as our relationship with our children.

When a child is doing well, it is important to recognize and celebrate it not only for the sake of the child, but for the parents as well. When our children are doing well, it means that we are doing well, and doing the right things for our children. Taking some time to let not only your child know how proud you are of him or her, but others outside the family unit as well, can go a long way to making your relationship with your child stronger, and help to solidify the parent child bond between the two of you.