When children are receiving survivor benefits due to the death of one of their biological parents, the family may be reluctant to do a stepparent adoption after the parent remarries, in fear of losing the monthly survivor checks for the children. While some households will still depend on that money, after remarriage, to run the household, many parents set the money aside for the child to have as an adult and do not wish to cut the child short financially by having him or her adopted by their stepparent.

The ... more

Holidays seem to always be a rough time for adopted children. With the sense of family and togetherness in the air, it can often leave them with strong thoughts and feelings about the people who are no longer involved in their lives. My adopted stepson has always had a hard time with holidays, this past year or so being the exception. He has finally begun to be able to move forward and enjoy the present, instead of dwelling on the... more

Some families choose to have ongoing contact with a birthparent who has agreed to a stepparent adoption, but still wishes to remain either in direct contact with the child, or with the child’s family. This type of open adoption arrangement is very common now with domestic infant adoptions, and is catching on in the stepparent adoption world since in some instances the biological parent has been involved on some level of the child’s life for years.

While some parents are horrified at the idea of open stepparent... more

Do I need the consent of my older stepchild in order to complete a stepparent adoption? This is a question that is asked quite frequently and the answer to it is yes, consent is needed to adopt a stepchild who is usually twelve and older. I say usually because laws vary from state to state, and even county to county so I am sure there are places where the age is either slightly older, or slightly younger than twelve.

While some parents are upset over the fact that a child could potentially hold up an entire adoption proceeding by not giving consent to the adoption,... more

It takes a lot to parent a traumatized child. They need more second chances, more reminders, more guidance, more structure, you name it, and they simply require more of it. It can be hard for parents to keep pouring themselves into a child, especially when the child seems to go out of his or her way to make sure that absolutely no progress is seen being made, if its actually being made at all. With traumatized children being... more

Both my adopted stepson and myself suffered trauma as children leaving the two of us with a large amount of fear and insecurity when it comes to relationships and ‘letting people in.’ These fears have contributed greatly to the push pull dance that the two of us do when it comes to bonding and getting close with each other. Once things are going well between the two of us, one of us becomes unconsciously freaked inside, and pulls away from the other in an attempt... more

With a stunted emotional maturity level my adopted stepson has never really been able to maintain a friendship with another child his age. He could interact with children younger than himself, as well as with adults, but with children his own age friendships usually lasted about a week before going sour.

This year is the first time in his fifteen years of life that he has had an age appropriate friend. They get along wonderfully, have a blast together and are having... more

Non-custodial parents are speaking up about the family court system and how current child support laws are doing more harm than good. Many fathers are complaining that the system is set up in such a manner that these non-custodial fathers are destined to fail. They claim that astronomical child support obligations are forcing them both into debt and out of their children’s lives.

With the amount of interest and late fees that are tacked onto child support obligations that have not been paid on time for whatever reason, small debts are accruing... more

The first time that I saw my adopted stepson’s amended birth certificate you could have knocked me over with a feather. There was just something too surreal about such an official record stating that I had given birth to a child in a hospital I have never even seen, let alone given birth in! Even though I knew that we would receive an amended birth certificate once the adoption had been completed, it still just seemed so, well odd.

Don’t get me wrong; I was thrilled to be on the document. To see my name listed as the mother,... more

For a number of families the finalization of their stepparent adoption will be their first experience inside of a courtroom. In some situations biological parents may never have married, thus never having to be present in court for divorce hearings after the relationship dissolved, and the same holds true if the parents never made a formal custody and visitation agreement for their child. If this is going to be your first time in court, than there are a few things to know about what should, and should not be ... more