More often than not stepparents harbor ill feelings towards the non-custodial parent of their stepchild. Unhappy with how their child, and sometimes their spouse as well, have been treated by the non-custodial parent in the past, the stepparent builds up a lot of anger and resentment towards the person who has hurt their family so deeply. Hearing the personal stories of abuse, neglect, and/ or abandonment as well as cleaning up, and living with the emotional scars that are left behind in the aftermath, can leave large and lasting amounts of resentment in even the most gentle of souls.

Yet the non-custodial parent is still part of the childÍs life and history, and badmouthing the... more

Tonight, for the first time my adopted stepson babysat his younger brother while my husband and I went to our HOA meeting. We have taken on the task of heading up the new neighborhood watch so we now have to attend all of the board meetings. Not wanting to subject the children to at least an hour of adults arguing with each other over streetlights, stop signs, and the general ‘goings on’ in the neighborhood, we caved to the request of our fifteen year old to just let him and his brother say home.

Well I really should say that we eventually caved, we actually said no three times and discussed the issue as many times before finally deciding that being only five minutes from the house... more

For many adults, going through a stepparent adoption will be their first experience with the legal system and trying to figure out who should be where to give what information can become very overwhelming for those who are just starting out on their stepparent adoption journey.

You do not want to take your child with you to the lawyer for the first visit, unless the lawyer specifically asks you to. During the first visit you are going to be giving the lawyer all the background information on the case, in adult and detailed fashion you are going to be telling him or her exactly why the child’s non-custodial parent should not be allowed to be in the child’s life, this is just not something... more

In many cases of stepparent adoption the child is not only losing one of his or her biological parents, but half siblings as well. Even when the children do not know one another very well due to the distance between the two or the infrequency of contact, the loss of the relationship that they could have had with each other is a very painful one for the adopted stepchild.

It is important that both the custodial parent, as well as the adoptive stepparent remember that the child is going to grieve the loss of his or her sibling, along with the loss of the biological parent. The parents are going to have to watch the child... more

Many times when parents first inquire about a stepparent adoption, the non-custodial parent is still somewhat involved in the child’s life. Either through child support checks alone, or perhaps sporadic visits here and there. One of the first questions that is asked, is how to get rid of the non-custodial parent, so that the stepparent can adopt the child involved.

Sometimes the non-custodial parent is in jail, or is abusive and the... more

Everyone who knows me knows that I am not a big fan of shoes. I will wear them when I have to, but once we get home, I get about three steps into the door before the shoes come off. I love to be barefoot, which is quite the contrast to my husband who wears shoes almost all day long, switching from work shoes to sneakers once he gets home, and leaving them on until bedtime.

After dropping my adopted stepson off at summer school this morning, my little guy and I had some running around to do. After going to a few stores and picking... more

Today my wonderful husband not only got off work early, but stopped off at the store and picked up the Apple laptop that I have been pinning over for the last few years, along with the photography software that I have been wanting as well. My adopted stepson overheard the phone call where my husband was excitedly spilling the beans of what he was bringing home for me, and instantly jealousy began to take over my teenager.

Yet instead of the typical childish jealousy... more

A 44 year old man was in the news recently, for failure to pay his court ordered child support for his three children, who reside with their mother. Richard Delancey pleaded guilty earlier this week to four counts of criminal nonsupport of three children, which is in violation of his 1999 child support order. Delancey was ordered to pay $669 per month to help support his three children, yet has failed to make a single payment since April of 2006.

Criminal nonsupport is a Class IV felony, which is ... more

When children have been abandoned by one of their birth parents, they are going to be left with a lot of unresolved feelings, anger, hurt, confusion, and etc. leaving them with some degree of anger issues. The children do not know how to express what they are feeling, their world seems to be spinning out of control, and the child is powerless to do anything about it, so they lash out with anger.

These anger issues can manifest themselves in different ways. The children can become ... more

There is a lot of debate in the adoption world over what labels the parents of the child should be called, and both sides have strong issues with just about every label either side has been able to come up with. The term natural parent, to some, implies that the adoptive parents are somehow ‘unnatural’ parents, so that term is offensive. Yet birthparent, especially birthmother, is highly offensive to others making them feel as though they are nothing more than a breeder supplying babies to childless couples. Each side wants a term that recognizes the importance of that set of parents,... more