Everyone enjoys getting special little cards and letters in the mail, and this holds especially true when it comes to children. Receiving a card, or a special “thinking of you” or “I love you,” letter makes a child feel very important as well as valued. But cards and letters don’t always have to come through the mail. By getting a little creative, you can show your adopted stepchild just how much you care about him or her, while still giving him or her the privacy to receive that love and special attention alone. This works especially well in the beginning of building... more

Taking a break from the serious side of adoption, as well as the serious, frustrating, pull your hair out in anguish, side of parenting, how about reading about something fun, and easy, that you can do with your child or children right in your very own home!

As I have written before in this blog, spending one on one time with your child, or children, is wonderful in too many different ways to mention, for building, and strengthening the relationship between you. And this simple, and easy to do craft will have both you, and your children, involved with one and... more

Sweetheart, honey, kiddo, baby, sport, and buddy. These are just a few of the nicknames, and terms of endearment that parents, all over the country, call their children each and every day. Usually starting at birth, where ‘baby’ becomes a term of endearment for the new addition to the family, the terms, and names for the child continue to grow and change as the child does, but the love, and the special meaning behind those little names are not lost on the child.

In most cases of stepparent adoption, unfortunately for the stepparent, he or she has come... more

While it is important for the adopted stepchild and the adoptive stepparent to form a secure bond and a stable, loving, parent child relationship, it is also very important to make sure that the child still has, or forms a strong relationship with the remaining biological parent. With being abandoned by one biological parent, it is important for the child to feel secure in their relationship with the remaining biological parent.

Children who have been abandoned by their parent, especially those who did, at some point, have some sort of relationship with the... more

Children love attention. In fact they crave it. Fitting family time in amidst soccer practice, business meetings, and conference calls can be extremely tough now a’ days. But what seems to be slipping away from many American families is the opportunity to spend quality, one on one time with our children. With the world becoming so fast paced, it seems that the very core of the family is being left behind for many, many families. This one on one bonding time is very important for the development of the parent child relationship, especially when it comes to... more

Some stepparents, even after going through the legal process of adopting their stepchild, may still be hesitant to really embrace the parent role. Still a little unsure of quite where the relationship between the two really lies, the parent hesitates, holds back, and doesn’t allow his or herself to fully take on the child as their own in their heart.

Just as the adopted stepchild can be afraid, and unsure of rejection by the stepparent, many stepparents are feeling just the same. Scared that if they were to bare their entire heart to the child, the child... more

Often times adopted stepchildren have severe trust and emotional issues, due to being hurt, and let down by a biological parent time and time again. The children soon learn to shut off their emotions, in order to protect themselves from the pain, confusion, and grief that the absent biological parent is constantly causing them. Once they have shut down their feelings, these children live in bleak, emotionless worlds; having decided it is better to feel nothing at all, than to always feel pain.

Once a stepparent... more

Many stepparents are faced with an immense guilt on a day-to-day basis. They do not feel the same deep bond and connection with their stepchildren, or adopted stepchildren, as they do with their biological children. They therefore theorize that they simply do not love the stepchild as much has they do their own biological child. Ashamed and embarrassed by these thoughts and feelings, they keep to themselves, isolated and alone, too afraid to seek help, for fear of being judged as a bad, or worse yet, as a heartless mother.

But the situation is not as bleak, or hopeless as some might think. Of course the feelings of love and a deep connection are going to be different between the... more

Many adoptive parents often become afraid that their child doesn’t like them, or desire a close relationship with them. They see the child shy away from touch, eye, and body contact. Generally, it is not that the child does not wish to get close, getting close to a new person is simply very scary for a child. Especially a child who has been hurt by a parent in the past. It is important to remember that it is not the child’s job to assure their parents that they love them. It is the parent’s job to assure the child that the child is loved. Very rarely will a child put their self out there first and seek contact, for fear of the risk of rejection. It is the parent who will have to put... more

1. Body Contact – touch is a very important sense. Be sure to give plenty of hugs, pats on the shoulder, and or and arm squeeze. Pick a level of touch that is comfortable for both you and your child.

2. Turn off the radio- Being in the car is a great time to be able to connect with your kids. With everyone looking straight ahead, those who have problems with eye contact feel less threatened and are able to open up more. With having nowhere else to go, or nothing else to do children are more inclined to talk than sit silently!

3. Eye Contact- Eye contact lets the person you are talking to know that you are interested... more