With summer vacation just around the corner, Friday being the last day of school here, I have begun to brainstorm ideas for some good summer bonding between my adopted stepson and myself. Our relationship has come a long way over the years, and with him turning sixteen at the end of this year, I know that our time for making summer memories is limited. Soon he will be involved in his own little life, and hanging out with mom isn’t going to... more

Since he was nine, I have written little love notes to my adopted stepson. He has always had problems with self-esteem, as well as feeling accepted in any sort of family setting. I had special markers, stickers, and even scrapbook paper that I used only for his notes. The fact that I had so many little things that were reserved solely for letting him know how much I loved him, made him swell... more

Today was the first warm day that we have had in quite some time. We were hit with a long spell of cold air, strong winds, as well as lots and lots of rain, and today it finally cleared up and actually felt like spring. It was nice to be able to actually get out of the house and be outside in the sunshine, instead of being cooped up inside the house! Although it has been quite cold, all the rain has made the grass in our yard shoot up like you would not believe, and with the lawn mower breaking at the end of last season, well our backyard has been... more

Stepchildren whom have been abandoned by one of their birth parents, and adopted later in life by a loving stepparent tend to have a lot of trust issues towards both of their parents, both biological as well as adoptive. Children, who have grown up always knowing their adoptive stepparent as mom or dad, can still have trust issues, but it seems to be less significant than in those who were adopted at a later age.

Adopted... more

While one on one bonding is an important aspect of creating strong emotional connections between you and your adopted stepchild, it is important to have family time for everyone to be able to bond as a family unit as well. Families often divide up, with one parent taking care of one child, and the other parent taking charge of another child. While this gives the parents a bit of a break only having to deal with one child at a time, instead... more

Emotionally damaged children can, and often do, close themselves off, not wanting to let others in for fear of getting hurt all over again. Doing their best to keep others out so as not to bond again and risk the pain of rejection, they can become extremely resistant to touch. Touching helps us to form deeper connections with one and other, to help us to connect with the world outside of ourselves, and to help reassure one another that everything is okay and that each is loved by the other. All of these emotions can be too great for an emotionally damaged... more

Along with the rejection of his birth mother, came a lot of emotional issues for my adopted stepson. Not wanting to become close with others who could potentially hurt him by leaving, or pushing him away, he became closed off emotionally. He did not react appropriately in social situations, there was no laugh when something funny happened, no sympathy when there was a sad event, there was in effect, nothing. He was nothing more than a blank stare for... more

With about two trips of randomly circling the parking lot, and a lurch out of nowhere towards the curb with an abandoned building behind it, which had the voice in my head screaming “Oh Lord this is it, here we either die or the insurance goes through the roof, JUMP, now, before its too late,” yet he managed to swerve the car back towards the entire empty large space of the parking lot, and bring the car to rest back at the same spot we had begun.

He sat there for a moment, and finally I reached over and put the car in park before he managed... more

He jumped out of the car and walked quickly around to the drivers side and hopped right on in, buckling up his seat belt. I got in the passenger side, and buckled up, while he firmly placed his foot on the gas peddle, revving the engine quite hard. “I am going to die in a church parking lot” was the first thought to come to mind, as I gently reminded him that he had to take the car out of ‘park.’ I got the typical ‘oh yeah’ response from a teenager who is half listening as he grabbed the shifter and began yanking at it with all of his might. “Yep,... more

Well by the time that I got home yesterday both my husband and my adopted stepson were glued to video game systems, sigh, so there really wasn’t much of a chance for bonding. We ordered pizza for dinner, but I don’t think my adopted stepson really enjoyed any of them. I was beginning to wonder if it was a sign that things were going to go downhill and I was certainly nervous about spending the day together today.

I decided before he got home to charge up the cameras, I am an avid photographer so I have several high-end cameras around the house,... more